Being Committed

There are times where I do not want to write a blog or an article. I would rather just sit down in a chair and look at the clouds move, listen to the cars pass by, and let my thoughts take over, taking me wherever they happen to take me. Then as I’m thinking, a sudden moment strikes me.

I realize writing isn’t something that I can do whenever I want. If I want to get good at something and have an impact on other people lives, I must practice at it, I must continuously get better at it, I must stay committed to it.

Commitment isn’t something where you just wake up one day and say you’ll do it; it’s an understanding within yourself that even when you don’t feel like you want to go on, you end up doing it anyway.

In college, I was excited to join one of those “hardcore partying” fraternities. I moved in with someone I knew from high school that was already in a fraternity so I ended up pledging for it as well. What I had in mind was nothing I was expecting it to be.

I ended getting myself into a fraternity that emphasized on “brotherhood,” “friendship,” and “service.” It wasn’t a bad thing, but it sounded something more like economy club from high school. And in order to “cross” and become a member, you had to go through I think it was twenty plus hours of community service and five to six hours of meetings every Thursdays at 8PM along with a responsibility to suck up to the members above you.

At first I thought it was stupid. I remember doing essays at meetings right before the next day where they were due. I remember that these meetings would actually last up until 3 AM while we spent an hour discussing if girls should wear gold dresses or not for a skit we had to put on. I remember playing silly little games similar to Duck Duck Goose. I also remember doing community service that involved ten people to plant one tree. It was a bit ridiculous, as well very time consuming.

During this pledging period, I could have quit at any given time but I didn’t. It could have been because everybody around me was so passionate about finishing this pledging process together (a quarter of a year) or that I was so far into it that I was committed to finishing. But even during pointless times where I felt my time could have been spent somewhere else, I continued anyway. I don’t think a lot of people thought I was going to cross, but I did end up passing a test at end enabling me to become a so called “brother.” And even up until today, that fraternity process is something that I’ll never forget.

Take a look at what goals you currently have right now. Are you in “a process” right now as well? Or are you being indecisive and worrying about not finishing?

When you make the decision to be committed to something, it means that despite any situation, you’ll do whatever it takes to see that it is carried out until the very end.

Too many people make goals that they cannot commit to and up end up feeling angry at themselves or discouraged.

Remember, if you plan on committing to something, you are promising yourself that you are going to finish it and see the results that you have intended in the first place. Don’t start committing to something if you even the smallest doubt in your mind. It’s not worth it if you’re not serious about. I’m sorry to sound harsh here.

Anything in life is achievable. This does not mean however, that it’s going to be an easy task. If you want to achieve the impossible, an immense amount of commitment needs to be put in. It’s crazy to think that some people get pissed off when they set a near impossible goal and then end up failing to commit to them.

  • I’m going to do whatever it takes to lose 20 pounds by the end of this week.
  • I’m going to do whatever it takes to make a million dollars by 6 months.
  • I’m going to do whatever it takes to find my soul mate in one year.

The truth is although it’s good to have big goals, it’s unrealistic to create goals that out of your commitment level. I know it can give you a brief spark of motivation to set big goals and say to yourself, “Man I’m going to do whatever it takes to finish this!”

But when you actually do it, not when starting out, not at the middle, but towards the very end, when everything just seems to crash down on you; you remember back when you said, “Man I’m going to do whatever it takes to finish this” and now it’s starting to turn into, “I can’t get this done; I just can’t get this done!”

Then the process of beating yourself up begins, whether this is feeling a sense of aggravation when time’s almost up or a feeling of failure because you didn’t complete what you assigned yourself to do.

I know this because in the beginning of the New Year, on New Year’s Day people make insane resolutions, but rarely do that every stay committed for 365 days until that reach that goal. Have you ever made a new year’s resolution but never finished it?

Sure we all have. I’ve been there and I know how good it is to start the new year fresh and make brand new goal for the year. I also know how it feels to be on New Year’s Eve and realize, “Wow it’s been a year and I have completed forgotten what my last year’s goal was… oh well let’s start a new one tomorrow.”

To cure this, don’t set what seems like impossible tasks for yourself if you have any doubts you can’t do it. Instead of trying to lose 20 pounds by the end of the week, starting a website and attracting 1000 daily visitors in a month, making a million dollars within a half a year, or finding your soul mate in one year, try doing things may seem extremely difficult, but you know that if you were to give it your all, you could commit to it.

  • I’m going to do whatever it takes to lose at least 2 pounds by the end of this week.
  • I’m going to do whatever it takes to make a million dollars in the next two years.
  • I’m going to do whatever it takes to approach 100 new people that I am interested in, have a conversation with them, and see if any strong, intimate relationship comes out of itwithin one year.

These are all things that are difficult to do. They are challenging, but not out-of-reach impossible. They are simply doable if you make the serious decision to commit to them.

That’s kind of the point I’m trying to get across to in this post. Don’t set goals that are unrealistic that you will get bitter or discouraged over. You should have big dreams, you should have big goals that are challenging, ones that takes your current level of commitment and turns it into something that you’ve never experience before.

But realize that once you make a decision to be committed to something, there should be doubts; there should be no more worries, no more procrastination, temptation, debates, mind games, and options.

There should just be pure, focused action.

It’s time to think about this and reframe.

  • What things do you have that are not finished?
  • What “near impossible” things were you doing that you can make possible to finishing?
  • What things do you have in the next week, month, year, and even two years do you want to accomplish?

When you have figured this out, ask yourself out loud, “Are you committed?” You may feel the need to repeat question ten times until you know inside that the answer is, “Yes I am!”

And when you have made the commitment; now it’s your responsibility to carry it out until the end despite whatever negative situation comes your way.

When you a commitment; there is no turning back my friend.

You’ve cross the bridge and now the bridge behind you has disappeared and turned into an empty gap above a bottomless pit. The only choice you have now is to move forward.